As women, nurturing and taking care of others is instinctual. This is why we so often put others’ needs before our own and feel that this is the correct way to go about things. In doing so, we feel that we are working hard at our relationships and keeping those around us happy. But did you know that you cannot effectively tend to the needs of others if your own needs are not taken care of, first and foremost? 

While putting ourselves first can feel selfish, especially if we are moms, wives, daughters and siblings, this counter-intuitive concept is not selfish at all! As the cliche goes, “you can’t take care of someone else unless you take care of yourself first” and this involves not feeling guilty about having some “me time” every now and then and understanding that putting your own needs first does not mean that you care only about yourself. 

If you have been feeling burned-out, stressed, overwhelmed and tired, it could be that you are giving far too much and taking far too little. In the process of giving all the time, you are neglecting yourself and doing a disservice not only to yourself, but to those around you and who reply on you. 

By tending to and loving ourselves, we are taking care of our physical, mental and emotional wellbeing. This is essential if we are to be effective at helping others. 

Putting yourself first can involve ensuring that you have a healthy balance between nurturing and giving back to others and treating yourself. Remember that it is ok to ask for help sometimes, which can be difficult sometimes but will benefit you in the long term. 

Finally, you should never feel guilty about tending to your own needs. After all, there is no one who understands you better than yourself!

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